“Individual, mysterious and personal”
As I read the previous post, I could not help but notice that my self-imposed shackles did not do me any good as far as restraining the words towards a lengthy post was concerned. Just as well, I should say. After all, I am not one to follow so-called advice that I do not care for, especially when they’re unsolicited. I sound a bit resentful, don’t I? Well, yes I do… no need to put on gloves… say, at least a little! But I do have some people in mind, or rather a flow of “insufferable know-it-all” (plural) invading my Internet browser and my mailbox to tell me that they know better than I do how to write… I k-n-o-w! I have talked about this before, but obviously, it seems that I have not made my peace with the subject yet. However, I am trying very hard to keep Anne Rice‘s words in the front of my head (instead of the back), especially when I feel a bit beaten down. Nothing incurable my friends, that’s why Poets of the Fall exist ?.
So, why am I whining about this again anyway? Apart from what I’ve said above, I think that it is easier this way… and it hurts less too… lately, it’s been like this: pieces of news have been hammering at my heart, some harder than others… I cannot give money for this or that, I could write about it of course, but what would be the point when others already do that? All in all, I have this feeling of powerlessness that makes me want to scream. The duality of our world, our species make me sick and numb… I will be able to explore such feelings in my writing and probably not on this blog, but for now… I just cannot because:
They’re locking up the sun, the light of reason gone
– Poets of the Fall – Locking up the Sun
Anyway, the lack of consistency in this series when it comes to the writing frequency, as I know you have noticed it, comes in great part from what I just explained.
Before we start – a little tradition
Since I am in that kind of mood today, another 100 words flash fiction that I’d like to share with you… it is from 2011 and I entitled it: Untitled.
The moon is in its last crescent and the letters are too faded to be visible in the dark. Spooky how races the mind at that time of night… any noise becomes suspicious… at noon, it is different as her alley is always easy to find: standing up to everyone, for no one to come… she’s always in the shade though, except at dawn when he greets her first, with its wakening warmth… then all the letters of her name shine like diamonds: “Jane Doe”… on her tombstone.
– Claire Perez Ekman – Untitled (2011) – Disconnected
You see, the forward quotes do not belong to the past. They still pull me towards the light even though I can be rather stubborn and try to resist with all my might… Sometimes, the light is not very appealing because it does not shine only on beauty but also on ugliness and right now at least, I’d rather not see. I am not depressed, mind you, it just happens that at the moment the path I am on is not very well paved, and rather bumpy. So yes, I do need my dose of Poets of the Fall to shake off the dust from my shoulders… but today, even they have troubles to pull me out of it…
//One more thing, there is a colour code (at least you might see both in a future episode) and before you ask, you don’t need me to tell you what it means, you’ll figure it out ?//
Carnival of Rust
(Poet of the Fall – The Forward Quotes – CoR)
- Fire: “It ain’t cool to be cool, though you may think it a laudable tool“
- Sorry Go ‘Round: “When ignorance spreads conformity”
- Carnival of Rust: “And more than ever, I hope to never fall, where enough is not the same it was before”
- Locking up the Sun: “They’re locking up the sun, the light of reason gone”
- Gravity: “Typical of me, that I concentrate on the destination
So much that I miss the journey there and back”
- King of Fools: “Will I be crucified for wanting to believe?”
- Roses: “But healing doesn’t seem to happen
When you hide away the seed
- Desire: “What never moves, is never still”
- All the way/4U: “So you can hold your head up high come what may”
- Delicious: “I’m looking to find pieces of wisdom I’ve misplaced”
- Maybe Tomorrow is a Better Day: “This day will die tonight and there ain’t no exception”
- Dawn: “It’s time to let go, it’s time to carry on with the show”
So, what are the quotes that will pull me forward and away from the self-pity I seem to linger in? When I read the quotes that I chose, not many would have the necessary quality to cheer me up… right?! Wrong! No need to be explicitly cheerful to bring positivism. However, Carnival of Rust is an album with a bitter look at society, at least when you read the quotes above. If I’d pick only one line for today’s post though, it would be:
I’m looking to find pieces of wisdom I’ve misplaced
– Poets of the Fall – Delicious
It does sum up exceedingly well how I feel… ? How will this help me move forward? Hmm… first, it forces me to change my focus and look away from my own navel ?. Second, as I look away, it makes me smile and shake my head in self-derision. “You’re such a silly woman sometimes.” I say to myself… “there are more important things to spend your energy on“, I continue. “Like what?“, I’d challenged my returning “wisdom”… “What does it matter? There just are… if you care to look.” Then of course, Poets of the Fall would intervene in a very subtle way ?:
Typical of me, that I concentrate on the destination
So much that I miss the journey there and back
– Poets of the Fall – Gravity
This is the best way I found today to show you how these precious musicians manage to get me back up. You see, even when it is not meant to be so, their lyrics have the power to challenge me… challenge my reason – or lack of… Suddenly, in awe with the ideas that came forth in this post, I realise that everything and everyone is linked in the most unexpected ways. Being a writer is “highly individual, mysterious and personal” said Anne Rice… and so is my take on Poets of the Fall‘s lyrics. So now the circle is complete…
I hear and understand what I need to, whenever I need to… sometimes, like today, I do have to provoke it… some other times, more dire with need, the words just pop-up like magic to enthral me and get me moving. So… time for me to move forward, one step at a time.
Until next time! ?